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In Loving Memory

of

Joy Margaret Sutherland Collis

20 September 1932 - 21 July 2024

St John's Anglican Church

St. John’s Road, Pembroke, Bermuda
Sunday, July 28, 2024 at 3 p.m.

Order of Service

Officiant: The Rt. Rev. Nicholas Dill, Bishop of Bermuda
Organist: Alana Simons

Prelude

Welcome and Opening Prayer

Opening Hymn

All Things Bright & Beautiful

Refrain:
All things bright and beautiful,
All creatures great and small,
All things wise and wonderful:
The Lord God made them all.

Each little flower that opens,
Each little bird that sings,
He made their glowing colors,
He made their tiny wings.
Refrain

The cold wind in the winter,
The pleasant summer sun,
The ripe fruits in the garden,
He made them every one.
Refrain

He gave us eyes to see them,
And lips that we might tell
How great is God Almighty,
Who has made all things well.
Refrain

Scripture Reading

1 Corinthians 13:1-13, The Greatest is Love ..... Justin Collis

13. 1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;
6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.
9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.
11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.
12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.
13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Reading

“Death is Nothing at All” ............................................. Caitlin Collis

Death is nothing at all.
It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.
Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just round the corner.
All is well.
Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!

Remembrances of Margaret

Alexander Collis

Joy Margaret Collis
My family and I thank you for being here today to pay tribute to the matriarch of our family and someone we had the privilege to call Mother, Grandmother and Great Grandma.

It was on Sunday, 21 July 2024, at her home of 60 years, surrounded by her three sons John, Grahame and Charlie and their families, that Grandma left us to join her husband, Charles, in heaven.

Although not unexpected, the shock-wave of her death was immense.

Over the last few days, we have been greatly comforted by your emails, phone calls and memories of Grandma.

She is someone that was and will remain extraordinarily dear in our hearts, and it is clear that the same is true for so many others.

Grandma was the constant of our family, until only relatively recently, her house was the chapel that we as a family congregated at most Sundays in the summer for dinner.

Many of you will remember Grandma who loved life and her family, a fiercely independent explorer and someone that enjoyed and appreciated every moment of life. Grandma enjoyed being surrounded by family and friends, however loud and boisterous they might be, but she was also a woman who was immensely at peace with her own company.

She loved any opportunity to travel with family and friends, but also never let a chance for discovery pass her by because the timing didn't fit the calendars of others: she appreciated new moments and experiences and enjoyed viewing them in all of the lenses available to her.

In recent years, as her health began to change, some of the more far flung explorations were no longer feasible, but that did not mean that discovery was over, any opportunity to see family was relished. Sometimes, just for the fun of it, she would ask Marivic or Evelyn, her kind caring companions, to take her for a drive to Dockyard or Mid Ocean, I understand that she even made it to St. Davids.
Grandma's spirit of adventure was central to who she was.

PARENTS
Born on September 20th 1932 in Krugersdorp, South Africa, Grandma was the eldest child of George and Joyce Ross, and the big sister to Jesse. Her father, George was employed as an engineer for one of the mining companies in Krugersdorp.
But other than mines there was little else in Krugersdorp, in particular for small children - and so at the very young age of seven, Grandma was sent to boarding school in South Africa, seeing her parents only during holidays and sandwiched between long journeys to and from school and home.

Although it must have been impossible for a 7 year old to comprehend what was happening, why it was necessary, and no doubt that early separation had a big impact on her life, it marked the start of her independent spirit.

Grandma did well at school and went on to study Classics the University of the Witwatersrand in Johannesburg and graduated with a bachelor degree in arts. Grandma had fond memories of her time at university and would regularly recount the mischief she and her friends would get up to.

Her early years laid the foundation for a life marked by curiosity and resilience. Moving forward into her young adulthood, Grandma's adventurous spirit took her beyond the familiar landscapes of her childhood.

LONDON YEARS
After graduating from Wits, Grandma attended a teaching college before taking advantage of a Commonwealth visa scheme which allowed recent graduates from within the commonwealth to live and work in England, Grandma moved to London and worked as a teacher.

One night in London, Grandma and her roommate, Denise lost their keys. Denise, without their key after loosing it. Denise, called a friend to ask if he could come accompany them whilst they waited for the locksmith. The friend was busy, but he agreed to find another friend to send in his place and that friend turned out to be Bermudian Rhodes Scholar, Charles Collis.

MARRIAGE
Charles and Margaret dated for some time in London, but before long Poppa explained, that like many Bermudians, he was planning on moving back to Bermuda and asked for Grandma's hand in marriage and for her to join him in Bermuda.

The journey to Bermuda was not straight forward. Grandma flew to Bermuda – but the direct London to Bermuda route she would eventually become very familiar with was not available at the time and her journey in a propeller plane followed the spruce routes, from London, over Scotland, stopping off in Greenland and then south into New York. In New York, there was a two day lay-over. Poppa's father was in the grocery import business in Bermuda at the time and had arranged, by way of letter, for his soon to be daughter in law to stay at one of his contacts in New York. Two days later Grandma arrived in Bermuda.

Grandma wanted to work when she arrived in Bermuda and so in the meantime, Poppa spoke with the Head Mistress of the Bermuda High School who said that all she needed was a Latin teacher, to which Poppa said, perfect, all my fiancée teaches is Latin.

Grandma would go on to be a dedicated and caring teacher and would later invite the school girls around to her house in the summer to sit on the lawn for extra lessons in Latin, even as a new mother. On Easter Monday, 22 April 1957 Grandma and Poppa married.

LIFE IN BERMUDA.
Shortly after their marriage, Grandma had her first son in June 1958, John, followed by Grahame in 1960 and Charlie in 1962. In about 1963 the family moved to Greenhill in Devonshire and the property very quickly became the local playground for the neighbourhood's children. The house must have been chaos, but Grandma loved every minute of it, welcoming all of the boys' friends into the house for dinner at any time.

At the same time, Grandma did her part in helping to build Bermuda into an international business centre by supporting Poppa. In the dawning era of Bermuda's international business, the foundation of client relationships was often built by personal connections that the families of working professionals made, quite often led by their partner. This was a role that Grandma took seriously, but relished the opportunity. She was well read and educated and enjoyed speaking with people and learning about them.

FAMILY
Grandma loved her family, wherever they were in the world. She remained very close with her sister Jessie speaking with her weekly. Jessie and her husband, Tony, also from south Africa, shared the same passion for exploring and would regularly travel with Grandma.
Whenever Grandma and her sister Jessie were together, you saw two sisters, smiling, laughing and joking and remembering. Notwithstanding the geographical distances nothing had changed, they were the two young sisters who grew up and laughed together in South Africa.

Grandma took a great deal of joy from her family. She loved watching her children grow and be successful in their careers. She adored her 8 grandchildren and 6 great grandchildren, the families she inherited through her marriage, and those of her children and grandchildren. We have such happy memories of gathering at Grandma's house on Sundays in the summer – they tie us together and keep us close.

FRIENDS
In Bermuda, Grandma had close friends whom she saw regularly. I recall hearing about her bridge games that she played with her friends on a weekly basis, the strategy involved and how challenging it was because each player, being longstanding friends, knew the next move of their counterpart. To this day, I still don't know what bridge is – but an excuse to gather with her friends on a regular occasion was welcomed.

She relished chances to see David and Janet Lines and their family and spent many happy Christmas' and summers with them. She did eventually put the skis back into the locker, and hung up the bathing suit, but anytime a skiing or Cup Match story came up, it would bring a smile to her face.

She found a friend and close confidant in Ruth Santucci and cared for her dearly – I loved hearing them laugh and carry on. She trusted Carlos and was comforted by his ever presence and closeness. More recently she faced the final stages of her journey with the caring support of Evelyn and Marivic and in her customary way, would remark, “I am so well taken care of”. The friendships Grandma had mattered to her and she was grateful for the people in her life every day.

TRAVELLING
It is no secret Grandma loved to travel and to experience the culture and history of other places. There are things in this world that she saw that we will never see. Grandma once told me of her sadness after learning that the Taliban had destroyed the giant Buddhas of Bamiyan in Afghanistan. She remembered standing at the base of them and looking up at these magnificent monuments in awe of their size and the engineering and artistic accomplishment of the ancient builders that built them.

She loved ruins and learning and exploring the towns of the ancient Romans or Greeks scattered around the world. She liked to imagine what life was like for the people in these places at their apex. In 2007, she organised a family trip aboard the Aegean Clipper, a 100 or so foot vessel in the Aegean sea, stopping at various sites, including Istanbul, Ephesus and Rhodes. The trip came with an oxford professor and curator of the British museum as our tour guide who walked us through ruined towns and villages explaining the sights as well as a former diplomat who orchestrated visas and permits for our group of over 30.

Grandma loved adventure, but cherished her origins on the African continent. It was important to her that as many of her family as possible visit the continent, and she made sure that happened. She took me when I was nine years old, two years later Richard, Caitlin and Justin next, and then in one big crescendo in 2005 she took all of us. The experience and the time as a family were fantastical.
END.
Grandma's 91 years of life was full of excitement, and I can do no justice to it by trying to summarise it here. But the message I want to convey is a message of gratitude to the woman who showed us the importance of the journey, that the adventure is an end in and of itself, that every experience is valuable, and to be grateful for the gifts that life gives us. We find comfort in the countless memories she left us and the lessons she imparted.

She explored, loved and was loved. But after the excitement of the adventure, or the end of the journey, Grandma valued the quiet moment of reflection. Grandma once told me, whilst recounting her life over dinner in London, that she loved being with Poppa to host and entertain friends, family, clients, but that her favourite part of the night, was the quiet moment at the end where she and Poppa would share a night cap together and reflect on the excitement of the evening or the journey. She is now in heaven with our grandfather, and is no doubt sharing life's nightcap and recounting stories of their adventures.

God Bless her!

Scripture Reading

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, “A Time for Everything” ...... Celine Collis

3. 1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Song

Smile by Charlie Chaplin ......................................................Christina Collis

Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it’s breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
you’ll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You’ll see the sun come shining through
for you
Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That’s the time you must keep on trying
Smile what’s the use of crying
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile
If you’ll just
Smile

Words of Comfort

The Rt. Rev. Nicholas Dill

Prayers & Lords Prayer

The Rt. Rev. Nicholas Dill

Commendation & Blessing

Recessional Hymn

Amazing Grace

Amazing grace! How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found;
Was blind, but now I see.

‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears relieved;
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed!

The Lord has promised good to me,|
His Word my hope secures;
He will my Shield and Portion be,
As long as life endures.

Through many dangers, toils and snares,
I have already come;
‘Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home.

When we’ve been there ten thousand years,
Bright shining as the sun,
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise
Than when we’d first begun.

Interment

Pallbearers

Alexander Collis, Richard Collis, Justin Collis, Sophia Collis, Ben Collis, and Ayalew Taye.

Message of Gratitude

The family would like to express their most sincere and heartfelt thanks to Evelyn Perez, Marivic Katigbak and Carlos Moniz, and the nurses and doctors of PALS, for their tremendous care and support of Margaret which ensured she was comfortable, happy and able to enjoy life to the fullest.

Invitation

The family sincerely appreciates the support shown here today and cordially invites you to join them at Harbourfront Restaurant in the Bermuda Underwater Exploration Institute between 4:15pm and 6:00 pm for a time of reflection and refreshment following the service.

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